Keeping New Years Resolutions  

Keeping my New Years resolutions has always been difficult, but what if Congress had to do the things I set out to accomplish this year. Could they do better?

Had I given my list to them and I were checking on how things are going, this is what I think they would say:

Eat better – the start of this one should be delayed until after the Pro-bowl (mid February). Really, We would be destined for failure without the support and encouragement of our fellow Americans. It makes no sense to try to fight cravings during the NFL playoffs and right after the Federal budget has been approved if our support network (other congress people) will be consuming large amounts of nachos, chicken wings and indulging in pork barrel. In our opinion, it’s actually best to start a diet after the NCAA basketball championship. There are a good couple of weeks there to drop a few pounds before the NBA season heats up and a new Federal budget is due.

Exercise regularly – well, we believe that walking down to the floor to filibuster and standing up during roll call voting is enough activity. We also realize that health care costs are way too high and wouldn’t want to expose ourselves to injuries that may require medical attention. Really, we’re just trying to be fiscally responsible.

Become more organized – the recent security improvements around the Capitol building have really cut down on unexpected constituent visits. We’re definitely much more organized now that fewer people are let in the building and there are fewer distractions. It’s so much better to be isolated and have time to do the things we really need to do – like spend your tax dollars.

Read more – we’ve received a number of letters about things like health care reform, overspending, and expanding Medicare services to cover long term care, but since they tend to deal with the same topics over and over, we have opted to look for more stimulating reading material. We just got our first copy of Harry Potter and are really looking forward to debating it.

Actually keeping the resolutions takes more effort than finding excuses not to keep them. So, overall, I think we’re right where we thought we would be this time LAST YEAR. By the way, this an election year. Would you like to contribute to our campaign funds and continue the great work we’ve started?